intellectually, i do know this, but that doesn't seem to matter to the feeling part of my brain.

as for the job, it's just a job and it's temporary, but it's the first time i've been out of the house for a full-time job since i've been here - all the other work i've done has been telework to the us from home. it turns out that i don't have the spoons to work (did i mention it's in a foreign language?) with other people and have any left over for me and Tem. at the very least, this has really brought home to us that i really do need some sort of intervention because it turns out that when i thought i was just lying around being a waste of humanity, it turns out that i was actually gathering spoons up for the other hours of the day where i could then appear mostly normal and not crazy.